## THE FORGOTTEN FIELDS (NOVEL) - Chapter 144
As winter gradually deepened, her belly swelled noticeably.
The transformation that she at first considered magical and satisfying turned into a calamity shortly after. The pressure on her body increased with the growth of the baby.
Talia groaned from the pain that almost split her waist and tried to change her posture carefully. However, there was no way to escape the pain, regardless of the angle at which she lay down.
"Does it bother you to turn to this side? I will give you a massage on your waist."
Marysine offered kindly, looking at her with compassion.
Talia nodded her head immediately. She detested anyone else touching her, but this was no time for hesitation.
"Can you raise your legs a little? Placing a cushion between them will make you feel more comfortable."
"Like this...?"
When she raised her knees a little, the woman inserted a cushion between them.
Talia let out a long sigh. That did not help much with the pain in her waist, but it seemed to relieve a little of the tingling sensation running through her legs.
"Tell me if you feel pain."
The woman leaned over the bed and began to apply pressure to her waist with the appropriate strength. Talia let out a long groan and stretched her numb legs.
The woman lowered her hands toward her legs, examined the tense muscles, and asked cautiously:
"How is the pain in your legs now?"
"What kind of question is that? Of course it hurts terribly."
"If you are truly suffering so much, may I burn some sleep herb for you?"
Talia frowned and fixed her gaze on the woman's face. Her peaceful countenance reflected only concern for her.
"Will that… not harm the baby?"
"It has already entered the stable stage, so there will be no major problem."
Talia looked at her belly with an expression of internal conflict. She desperately desired to get rid of the pain even if only for a moment, but she feared that it would have a negative impact on the child.
While she debated in her thoughts, Tyuran suddenly intervened in the conversation while arranging the firewood in front of the fireplace:
"It is better to avoid medications as much as possible. It is still not known with certainty how sleep herb affects the fetus."
Marysine looked at her with annoyance.
"Do you think I would prescribe something that harms Her Highness the Princess? I have prescribed pain relievers to mothers before and no problem has ever occurred."
"But there are always exceptional circumstances…"
"Enough."
Talia interrupted the discussion sharply. She was in no mood to endure the subtle bickering between the two women.
"Even if I take the medication, I will feel pain again when I wake up. I will simply try to bear it."
"But you cannot sleep well due to the pain. If exhaustion overcomes you..."
"I said that is enough! Move away if you are going to keep chattering."
Talia pushed her away roughly and covered herself with the blanket up to her head. She had no energy left to waste time on useless disputes.
The bones of her shifted pelvis were pressing on the nerves due to the widening of the uterus, causing her aching legs to go numb in a terrifying way and the cramps to increase. Furthermore, the pain in her waist worsened day by day. She felt despair at the thought of having to endure this torment until summer.
Talia gently pressed her swollen lower belly with both hands. She felt the slight movement of the fetus under her taut skin. Her resentment toward the baby vanished in an instant. However, she had the firm intention of complaining a little when the child was born.
"I have suffered too much because of you. But I bore it all. So you will have to listen to me carefully. And you will have to love me more than anyone else in the world… I will do the same."
She continued thinking about it innocently, until she fell asleep at some point.
When Talia opened her eyelids due to a touch on her forehead, she saw Varkas's shadowed face contemplating her, so she sat up quickly.
"When did you come?"
"I just returned after concluding my official duties. Stay lying down."
"I don't want to. My waist hurts from being lying down all the time."
She brushed away his hand that was trying to make her return to the resting position, placed some cushions against the headboard of the bed, and sat up; then she examined him thoroughly while he wore his military uniform. Attired in his reddish-brown jacket, adorned with luxurious oriental embroidery, and his high black boots, he looked like an elegant and solemn nobleman.
"Did something happen?" Talia asked in a suspicious tone while inspecting his appearance, which was more formal than usual.
Varkas replied calmly while unbuttoning his jacket:
"I only attended a meeting of the nobles' union."
"Are there many meetings these days? Did a problem arise?"
"There is no problem. More importantly, why did you change rooms?"
Suddenly, Varkas showed his displeasure and changed the subject. Talia wrapped her arms around her knees and lowered her gaze bashfully.
"I don't want you to lose sleep because of me. It is better that we sleep in separate rooms until I give birth to the baby."
"Put aside that ridiculous consideration," Varkas spoke with a somewhat sharp tone and leaned his body over the bed.
Realizing that he was trying to carry her, Talia retreated toward a corner of the bed.
"This is more comfortable for me."
His eyes narrowed. Varkas contemplated her, then sat on the edge of the bed and objected with a cold voice:
"Didn't you tell me before that you felt uncomfortable if I didn't tend to you myself?"
"That was then… but now it's different."
"What is different about it?"
Talia looked at Varkas's firm and gallant features, with his back illuminated by the glow of the room, and then lowered her gaze toward her own body, wrapped in the fine nightgown. She saw her chest, which had widened noticeably, and her swollen belly. Her slender body no longer seemed attractive to her; on the contrary, that bloated appearance on the verge of bursting was utterly unappealing to her. Regardless of the happiness the baby caused her, she began to feel miserable about her appearance, which was not elegant like Ayla's nor seductive like Senevier's.
She pulled the blanket over her shoulders and spoke with marked annoyance:
"It didn't hurt like this back then."
"For that very reason I must be by your side to take care of you more."
Varkas frowned and extended his arms toward her again. Talia stepped aside in surprise. However, his long arms encircled her back before she could escape. Talia was immediately drawn toward his lap, so she hurried to pull the hem of her nightgown to cover her feet.
Nonetheless, it seemed that Varkas's attention was focused solely on her waist. He gently massaged the muscles near her spine with his firm hand, and then frowned upon seeing her distressed face.
"Does it hurt that much?"
Talia stared at him with eyes flooded with tears. This man would never understand her desire not to show her transformed body. She knew perfectly well that it was an absurd feeling; however, Talia had wished to be the most beautiful in his eyes since she was nine years old. To the point where it caused her despair not to be able to be so.
"Yes, it hurts as much as it possibly can," she grumbled angrily, instead of confessing it to him sincerely. "It hurts to death. Why must I be the only one to suffer like this? I wish you suffered half of what I suffer."
"…Then, you should have tortured me instead of changing rooms," Varkas whispered, trying to comfort her while stroking her back.
Her heart quieted for a moment due to the soft tone of his voice, but when his hand descended toward her swollen belly, she hurried to flex her knees and curl her body.
"I don't want to. Don't touch me."
"Why don't you want to?"
The man's face, which had been showing her patience the entire time, hardened. It seemed that his patience had finally run out. Varkas inhaled deeply and asked with a slower voice: "It is my child. Why do you not allow me to touch it lately?"
"It is not your child."
His face froze with coldness at her words, uttered by way of complaint. Talia felt fear for a moment, but continued speaking with total detachment:
"It is my child and no one else's, until it enters the world. It is only fair that I have the exclusivity rights while I carry it inside and endure all this pain."
The expression lines on Varkas's forehead deepened due to her words, which were nothing more than pure stubbornness.