C 138
"Next door..."
"Oh, hello. I stopped by earlier to give you a welcome gift, but I thought you weren't here."
He was a plainly dressed man. His hair was dyed blonde, and he had piercings like a gangster, but it didn't quite suit him.
I nodded hesitantly as I watched him scratch his neck.
"Ah..."
"I heard you come in right away, so I came quickly. 'The soundproofing here isn't very good.'"
It wasn't intentional, but I shook my head as I watched him add that he was sorry if he offended me.
It was clear that the soundproofing was terrible.
"It's okay."
"This is nothing special, just a simple welcome gift! Rice cake and... and this is a handkerchief."
It was a very rough and unattractive gift.
"Even nowadays, there are people who share these kinds of things."
I wondered if he really came from the countryside, but I didn't want to continue the conversation, so I nodded.
"I'll accept it, thank you very much."
"Oh, yes! I've been holding onto it for too long. Sometimes I would come by and try to say hello."
"Yes."
Suddenly, Lucilion came to mind because of that innocent and smiling face.
"This is serious."
I won't have anything to do with that world for a while.
"Then I'm tired, so I'll just go in."
"Yes, rest!!"
I felt like if I had a tail, I would have wagged it vigorously from both sides.
As I lay on the bed, I felt strange. Where have the soft, high-end beds gone? Hard, cheap beds are uncomfortable for no reason.
"Three years..."
What do I have to do?
The problem is, there's nothing I really want to do.
"Just..."
It wouldn't be a bad idea to live like trash until my body rusts away.
"Isn't it nice?"
You eat what you want, do what you want, go where you want, and live like trash.
So, what does it matter if I gain some weight? I don't have to worry about my health because I'm going to die anyway.
["If you become happier than anyone else in the world, the guardian of the stars will eventually have no choice but to give up and let you go."]
["...really?"]
["They don't need a happy soul."]
I thought it would be nice to be happier than anyone else for the sake of the guardian of the stars who doesn't need a happy soul.
Let's just make ourselves happy without feeling jealous or envious of others.
"All right."
I should write a wish list or something.
I got up, took out a pen and a notebook, and calmly started writing.
* * *
The next day, I took my phone and checked my bank account. Fortunately, I had enough money to play and eat for about three years.
The company had already processed resignations.
"Next..."
I need to go to the hospital address I received yesterday.
I wanted to see with my own eyes how she was doing.
My grandmother was the one who got me into this hell.
She started the whole process of dispelling the hatred that began with the strong ideology of preferring boys.
If she hadn't treated my mother so poorly and hadn't discriminated against her just for giving birth to a daughter, at least they wouldn't have looked at me with such a horrible and repulsive gaze and wouldn't have hated me.
It would have been a slightly better relationship, at least.
Did she say Sorok Hospital?
It was a refreshing feeling to use public transportation in the bustling city of Seoul for the first time in a long time.
After passing through the bustling city, I arrived at a large hospital. I requested a visit and entered the hospital room. It was customary to buy a bouquet of flowers.
"I didn't know I had a granddaughter. The family may be busy, so they don't come often."
"Yes, I also woke up from an illness recently."
"Oh, grandma must be happy."
When I smiled, the nurses congratulated me for being polite.
When I entered the hospital room, I closed the door firmly.
Beep-beep-beep-
There was a regular mechanical noise and a strong smell of alcohol, typical of a hospital.
As I entered, my grandmother was lying in a single room bed, barely breathing, with a respirator connected to her mouth.
As I approached, my grandmother's eyes rolled back.
My grandmother's eyes opened, and soon they turned bloodshot. I smiled.
"Hello, grandma."
It was quite strange that only her eyes could move without her being able to move at all, making me wonder if her spine had been completely shattered or if her bones were crushed.
"Uh, uah...!"
I thought everyone's memories had disappeared, but that wasn't the case. Judging by her reaction, my grandmother's memory seems to be intact.
Otherwise, there would be no way she would look at me with such hateful eyes.
I filled the vase I brought with me, trimmed the flower stems, and placed them in the vase.
Hoping they would bloom for as long as possible.
"It's quite funny, Grandma, that you always looked like a hot mountain, and now you're like this, and I'm so healthy."
"Oh..."
"I heard you're aging, and your bones aren't growing well. I heard the surgery was difficult, and your bones were shattered."
I heard you live a life where you can't even go to the bathroom or do anything on your own.
As the voice added, my grandmother's eyes turned bloodshot.
"I hope my grandma is very, very distressed. I hope you regret it until you die. For at least about 20 years."
I wished she would be a little unhappier than the life I lived.
"You know? I don't remember ever being properly held in my mom and dad's arms since I was born."
I said, arranging the vase and placing it right next to the bed.
"I heard my grandma said I would have bad luck. Since the first child was a girl, it would be unlucky."
"Kuegh..."
"So, I wish my grandma would be just as unhappy."
I didn't want my grandmother to die young.
I wanted her to survive this life for as long as possible.
"How long do you think it will take? The family you raised with love will treat my grandmother as a burden."
Until now, no one would have said anything because Grandma had a lot on her plate. But what's left of Grandma who has become like this?
Are there still people to threaten for her money?
"How long will it take? She was a spendthrift for the clothes she wore and what she ate, but how much money is my grandma wasting while using a single room?"
I laughed. I wished she could feel that misery with her whole body and be miserable until she died in a nursing home.
Grandma struggled. As she groaned and struggled, the respiratory tract that had been bitten off came off slightly.
"I heard your organs are damaged, and you can barely breathe through this respirator."
I said, slightly holding my breath. My grandmother's eyes opened wide.
"Don't worry, I don't want my grandma to die either."
However, I just want you to know how hard it was for me.
I slightly pulled the respirator out. I didn't forget to spread it as if I were struggling.
"Ah... ugh, yes, zor-... argh...!"
Who would look at me and say I'm an evil spirit?
I looked at the elderly woman with bloodshot eyes as she struggled to breathe more and more.
I slowly pressed the nurse call button as I watched her eyes slowly close and her breath fade away.
Before long, the door swung wide open.
"Ah... My grandmother started having difficulties when she saw me, and her respiratory system suddenly started to fail."
I smiled as I watched the nurse quickly order.
The elderly woman slowly rolled her eyes at me.
I slowly pursed my lips.
"Why? Grandma dropped me in that pond once too."
My grandmother's eyes opened wide.
I looked at the busy nurses and then turned slightly.
There was a time when I was scared and stepped on the hem of my grandmother's clothes while walking on the street, so she kicked me, and I fell into a pond.
It wasn't very deep, and I wasn't in danger of dying. But at that moment, I really thought I was going to die.
I was small, and the pond barely came up to my chin if I stood up.
"Who would be the first to realize that my grandma has a pollen allergy?"
When one of the family members comes, they'll clean it up. Although I'm not sure when they'll do it.
I chuckled to myself at the joy that welled up from within.
A person's life should be honest.
Because everyone is given the same opportunities. Inevitably, the time will come when the strong become weak.
Even if it happens decades later.
"There comes a time when children need to take care of their parents."
There were many people in the world who believed they would always be powerful and in the highest position.
Are you sure the little wound you inflicted on your child won't be a wound that will hurt you for the rest of your life?
"I, too..."
I wanted to be a good granddaughter and a good daughter. Even if everything is already gone.
I was about to leave the hospital room.
Suddenly, my shoulder bumped into someone. My body trembled.
"Oh, I'm sorry."
I bowed and greeted.
"It's okay."
A very pleasant and deep voice landed in my head. When I raised my head, I saw a handsome, cold-looking man looking at me.
"Are you hurt anywhere?"
"Ah, no."
I didn't fall at all.
"You'd better be careful."
"Yes."
He held me firmly and soon turned away, busy.
"What is it?"
He's a strange person.
I was about to start walking, but soon I noticed that the black T-shirt I was wearing was very wet.
"What?"
The moment I held it in my hand and then unfolded it, wondering if there was something on it.
I noticed a thick dark red liquid on my hands.
"...blood?"
I was startled and turned around, but the man was no longer there.